Bearcastle Blog » Cheesy Dreams

Cheesy Dreams

Thanks to Annie at Maud Newton's blog, I got to read this fascinating report from the British Cheese Board* called "Sweet Dreams Are Made Of Cheese". With a title like that, you know it's going to be good.

The thesis is simply stated at the outset:

The age old myth that cheese gives you nightmares has finally been laid to rest this week following the release of a new study carried out by the British Cheese Board.

The in-depth Cheese & Dreams study, a first of its kind, reveals that eating cheese before bed will not only aid a good night’s sleep but different cheeses will in fact cause different types of dreams.

Summarizing some of the startling conclusions:

85% of females who ate Stilton had some of the most unusual dreams of the whole study. 65% of people eating Cheddar dreamt about celebrities, over 65% of participants eating Red Leicester revisited their schooldays, all female participants who ate British Brie had nice relaxing dreams whereas male participants had cryptic dreams, two thirds of all those who ate Lancashire had a dream about work and over half of Cheshire eaters had a dreamless sleep.

The cheeses [all British!] used in the study were

I suspect the researchers were most surprised to find that the vast majority of Stilton eaters slept well, albeit with "odd and vivid" (men) or "bizarre" (women) dreams. Fortunately, these odd, vivid, or bizarre experiences were not unpleasant.

Highlights included talking soft toys, lifts that move sideways[#], a vegetarian crocodile upset because it could not eat children, dinner party guests being traded for camels, soldiers fighting with each other with kittens instead of guns and a party in a lunatic asylum.

There are other descriptions of interesting dreams reported by the cheese-eaters, but I wouldn't want to give it all away. But don't forget:

There are over 700 varieties of British cheese available, with a British Cheese for every occasion.

This, of course, rather leaves the door open for all sorts of comparative studies between the dreams induced by various national cheeses, particularly among those of native nationality. However, that does leave one wondering what Americans would dream after eating American Pasteurized Process Cheese-Food Product.
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*Lately I've been reading cookbooks that seem to be compilations of "favorite recipes", often provided by manufacturers or "boards" that promote different foods, or combinations of foods, in different parts of the US. Things like "Washington State Apple Advisory Board", or "Philly Cheese-Steak Promotion Board", many of them for foods that you'd think couldn't generate enough interest to pay for one advisor, let alone an entire board. I'm looking forward to the day when I have some leisure to explore some of these boards and their favorite recipes, although I fear that my blog's 4 readers may pay the price for it.
*In passing, it makes one wonder whether, perhaps, Roald Dahl had enjoyed a bite of fine English Stilton before writing the relevant portions of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. When I was in sixth grade, our teacher would read to us for a short while after recess, while we students put our heads down on our desks and rested. That Dahl book was one of her choices, and I was terribly impressed by the idea of a lift that could move sideways. [This note added a day later.]

Posted on September 29, 2005 at 23.13 by jns · Permalink
In: All, Curious Stuff, The Art of Conversation

2 Responses

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  1. Written by S.W. Anderson
    on Saturday, 1 October 2005 at 01.03
    Permalink

    You have to love the Brits for undertaking such a fanciful study, evidently in a serious way. Considering its focus is gastronomic, I wouldn't have been at all surprised for the French to have done it.

    As for, ". . . what Americans would dream after eating American Pasteurized Process Cheese-Food Product."

    Uh, maybe a torrid laison at Motel 6 with Joan Rivers, Phyllis Diller, Ben Stein or the nebbish banker character in the Ditech.com commercials, depending on gender and orientation?

  2. Written by jns
    on Saturday, 1 October 2005 at 22.02
    Permalink

    According to the Cheese Board [UK], the British are quite proud of their cheeses, and take them rather seriously although, to their credit, not too seriously.

    As for the Motel-6 scenario — definitely some possibilities there, you wicked, wicked person!

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